Non Veg Jokes

Displaying 17-24 of 1267 results.
Jul
23
2013

Nonveg Bonanza


???Nonveg Bonanza???
Question - What Is Difference Between A BOOT (Shoes) CHOOT.?
Zabardast Answer -
BOOT Accepts Only ONE Size, Whereas CHOOT Accepts ALL Sizes.. ?
???
College Me, Mam-"

Lakir ka Fakir" Muhavare ka udhahran do"
Boy"
Aap Bura to Nahi Manegi?
Mam-
Nahi Bura Q?
Boy-Aapki Panty ke andar
jo Lakir he
Hum Uske fakir hai.. ?
???
ek wife ko shadi k bahut salo baad pta lga k uska husband CHHAKKA h aur usko Plastic k Lund se chodta tha....wife- tumne itni bdi baat mujhse chhupai, tumne meri zindgi barbaad kr di.....
husband- baat ko aagey na badhao, maine itne salo me kbi puchha k BUNTY & BABBLI Plastic k Lund se kaise paida ho gye? ???????


Aaj kal ke bachho ki haramipanti :

MADAM : shor mat karo nahi to khadda kar dungi..

Bachhe:
pehele mera..
pehele mera..
pehele mera..
_____________

Beta-Papa, Ye "Sex" kya hota hai ?

Santa thinks oye bahenchod ye kya puch liya bete ne, par batana to padega.

Aftr that he says- Beta, sex me hum ladki k kapde utarte hai fir apane kapde utarte hai, fir ladki ko pas me late hai uske boobs dabate hai fir vo hamara lund chusti hai, fir hum uski gand me ungal karte hai, fir tel laga k ladki ki chut me lund dal k hum lund ander bahar karte hue use chodte hai.

Ye hota hai sex.

Beta- Admission form me kya likhu? :D
_____________

GIRLS put makeup, lots of creams , sexy perfumes & they make the best hairstyle EVER.
.
.
Finally guys look at them and say:
.
.
BHENCHOD GAAND DEKH SAALI KI .... :p !

__________

Boy: Tu kitne baje uthti hai?

Girl: Apna koi time nahi hai. Jab dil kare so jaati hoon, aur jab dil kare uth jaati hoon

Boy: Naughty! Tu bilkul mere LODE pe gayi hai.. :D


______________

Customer- bhai saheb dettol sabun hai?

Dukandaar (lauda khujlate huye)- haan hai.

Customer- to behen k lode, us se haath dho ke 1 kilo cheeni dede.

-----------------------------
TATA ko ab pata chala ki
NANO CAR Me 2 Problems hai..
1. Pregnant Woman andar nahi aa sakti.
And
2. Car ke andar Normal Woman Pregnant nahi ho sakti..! ;)
------------------------------
Doct.-Mareez ko Agar 1 ghanta pehle le aate to hum isey bacha lete.

SANTA-bhenchod, aadhe ghante pehle to acident hua, fir 1 ghanta pehle kya hospital gaand marvane laate?

Submitted By : lafanga
Place : rajkot
195 Likes
12 Dislikes
Rating :   130 Votes


Aug
19
2013

Vulgar but Funny so its worth reading


Vulgar but Funny so its worth reading...
#...Before sex, you help each other get naked. After sex, you dress only yourself..
Moral: In life no one helps you, once you're fucked.

#...Success is like pregnancy. Everybody congratulates you but nobody knows how many times you got fucked to achieve it.

#...What is the difference between frustration and satisfaction?
What the Fuck! and What a Fuck!

#...3 people having sex is a threesome, 2 is a twosome. So next time someone calls you 'HANDSOME', don't take it as a compliment!

#...Life is like a dick, sometimes it becomes hard for no reason.

#...Practical thought:
A husband is supposed to make his wife's panties wet, not her eyes. A wife is supposed to make her husband's dick hard, not his life..?????

Submitted By : Deepak
Place : Noida
51 Likes
7 Dislikes
Rating :   41 Votes


Apr
6
2013

USTAD JI Kahte hain ki -


USTAD JI Kahte hain ki :-

"Machhi aur Ladki khud pakad k khao to maza hai...

Lund or Kanoon kabhi hath me na lo...

Naukri or Kutte pe kabhi laat na maro...

Ladki jitni marzi lambi ho wo Lund hamesha let kar hi leti hai...

Lohe par hathoda or Chut par Louda tab maro jab wo garam ho...

Kismat ki karni, Chut ki garmi or Lund ki Besharmi nahi rukti...

Or ehtiyat se sex kro Qki...

Bandook se nikla Foulad or Chut se nikli aulad kabhi wapis nahi hoti..."

Submitted By : manish sharma
Place : new delhi
97 Likes
31 Dislikes
Rating :   92 Votes


Mar
10
2012

Doctor :- Jor se saans lo....aur jor se


Doctor :- Jor se saans lo....aur jor se....very gud....aur jor se....aur jor se.........

Achanak awaaz aati hai "KHATAAAK".

Doctor (khush hote hue):- haan ab bimari ka pata chala.....haddi fracture hai.......


LADY (gusse se laal hote hue) :- haddi fracture nahi haraamzade....BRA ka hook tut gaya....:-)

Submitted By : SmsFunBook Team
345 Likes
13 Dislikes
Rating :   38 Votes


Mar
14
2014

Santa Ke Suhagrat Pe Light Nahin Thi


Santa Ke Suhagrat Pe Light Nahin Thi...!
NO.1 JOKE
Santa Naukar Se Bola:
Tu Lalten Pakad, Main SEX Karta Hoon..

Naukar Ne Lalten Pakdi Aur Santa
SEX Karne Laga..!

Santa Biwi Se: Maza Aaya.?

Biwi: Nahin..

Santa Ne Phir Koshish Ki Aur Phir
Biwi Se Pucha: Ab Maza Aaya.?

Biwi: Nahin..

Santa Naukar Ko Bola: Yeh Lalten Mujhe De,
Main Pakadta Hoon.. Tum SEX karo..

Naukar Shuru Huwa..!

Jab Kaam Khatam Huwa To Santa Ne
Biwi Se Pucha: Ab Maza aaya..??

Biwi Boli: Haan Bahut Maza Aaya..

Santa Naukar ko Thappad Mar Ke
Bola: Dekha Chutiye.... Aise Pakadte Hain Lalten.!

Submitted By : mukesh singh bachharara
Place : ratangarh
239 Likes
19 Dislikes
Rating :   319 Votes


Sep
11
2013

Student Miss Aap DoOdh peeti hain


Student: Miss Aap DoOdh peeti hain?........



Miss: Haan r0z peeti hun.Kyun?..........



Student herat se: Aap ka Munh p0hanch jata hai.?

Submitted By : ankit
Place : patna
76 Likes
34 Dislikes
Rating :   92 Votes


Jul
20
2013

On first night after marriage


On first night after marriage
Wife : Mujhe ghabrahat ho rahi hai.
Husband : I thinK because this is your first night.
Wife : No, no.. Actually it is first time in night?

Submitted By : SHYOJEE RAM KUMAWAT
Place : BHILWARA
52 Likes
11 Dislikes
Rating :   48 Votes


Oct
17
2013

Nipple se tapak raha pasina


Nipple se tapak raha pasina,
.
nipple se tapak raha pasina..
.
Bhigi hui gaand aur lathpath seena..
.
Ab tumhi batao "Ghalib"..
.
itni garmi me Koi kaise thoke hasina..!!??

??
Pati bola: Good nite,

patni : aise kaise good nite

Band karo light,

hathyar karo tight, lelo nipple ka bite,

karlo pussy se fight,

Aur gira do apna BIRLAWHITE!

Tab hogi good night

??
English teacher:
Aaj Sabko'My Best Friend' par 10 line likhni he,
thodi der baad 1 student ne Uthkar Puchha

Madam,'Bhosdike' ko English me kya Kehte hai....?

??
Girl :- Mujhe tumhare chutkule bahut pasand hai.!

Boy :- Mujhe bhi tumhare Chut aur Kule bahut pasand hai.!

Rishta vahi , Soch Nayi..!

??
Ek Neta Ji Hospital Ka Survey Karne Gaye
General Ward Mein Dekha Ek Mariz Muthh Maar Raha Tha.
Neta Ji Ne Hairan Hote Hue Doctor Se Puchha: ?Ye Kya Hai??
Doctor Ne Samjhaya: ?Is Ka sperm Bahut Tezi Se Banta Hai Hourly Nikalna Jaruri Hai.?
Neta Ji Agle Ward Mein Pahunche
Udhar Ek Nurse Mariz Ka Lund Choos Rahi Thi
Ye Dekh Ke Neta Fir Hairan Hue Aur Doctor Se Puchha: ?Ab Ye Kya Hai??
Doctor: ?Bimari Wahi Hai Par Ye Deluxe Ward Hai..????

Submitted By : Ankush
Place : Delhi
83 Likes
9 Dislikes
Rating :   92 Votes